My Son is Leaving Home

My Son is Leaving Home

Story by Pam Hyden

My son, Sam is trying to write his resume at present, and he is wondering what he can put in it. I tell him about the awards he has won, the activities he has been involved in, and a whole bunch of other information - but to him it is just part of his life and nothing that special. Others think he is special because he is totally blind. How blind people ask me - "He has two plastic eyes," is my response. I have a problem with the word special - I have two children who are special to me - how can the one with a disability be more special to me than my other child?

Sam has just finished Year 12 and is preparing for his GAP year - to participate in a volunteer program overseas in the UK for the next 12 months. People keep asking me if I am OK with that. "Won't I miss him?" But it is time for him to go - he needs to go, and I know I have done the best I can so he can go. Sam is intelligent, competent and capable, and just like his peers, it is age appropriate for him to go through this rite of passage and begin to lead his own life.

I am very proud of Sam. People comment on how well he has done with his secondary studies, (for which he achieved an excellent result) and how well I have done as a parent, BUT......... I have done no more than any other parent, and Sam has worked hard like his peers to achieve his results. There is no need for people to make a ‘special' comment about Sam.

It has been a long journey raising Sam as a single parent, but I have been fortunate in having a supportive family and services to assist along the way. Like any other child with a disability, they don't come with a guide book. I am and will always be ‘mum'. I have been able to choose resources according to my values, to assist in the development of Sam and to those involved I say thank you.

Sam is a grounded young man who does not wish to be any different from his peers. At school he has participated in all activities like his peers - only the tools and methods have been a little different. From camps to sporting activities, from co-curriculas to his academic studies, from performances to public speaking, Sam has done it all. More importantly he has ‘educated' his peers and staff in working with people with a disability and impacted greatly on their own levels of tolerance and respect.

As a parent I am proud of his achievements, but glad that he has ambition, independence and self-advocating skills as these will support him greatly in the next stage of his life journey.